It’s no surprise statement that men and women are two totally different species. From cleanliness to multitasking to dealing with feelings, men are the opposite end of the spectrum than women. Occasionally though, a parts of a woman’s personality will match up with a typically masculine trait. When trying to judge one’s personality, an uncommon way is to see what’s in someone’s gym bag, car trunk, or my personal favorite, a handbag. The combination of items in these bags begin to tell the story of who carries the handbag and differentiates them from the gym bag carrier.
But men don’t have handbags, but they do have golf bags. And when the items contained in a man’s and woman’s bag are eerily similar, you may have a bag of the opposite sex. Which leads me to my question: do YOU have a man’s golf bag?
As you will see, I’m probably not your avid male golfer. I may even be an exception to most male golfers out there. So I would hope your golf bag contains only one or two of these items while three or four is pushing it. If it happens you own all seven, well, you may want to reevaluate your bag.
1. What IS that smell??? Sometimes I even ask myself this question. My golf glove (actually a baseball glove) is usually two or three years old full of sweat and stinks to high heaven. Even after the match, the stench still lingers on my hand for a few hours. Gross? I’ll let you decide.
2. All things get better with age. Wine, cheese, and… sports drink? You might find this deep down in that bag pocket you check but three times a year like I did. Not sure how old this historic artifact is, but it should have been pitched a while ago.
3. Look good to play good. If you have a pair of sports sunglasses, it’s perfectly okay. They were just in my golf bag so I could look cooler than David Duval in his prime without worrying about the cost of replacements. No one can see where I’m looking wearing big dark sunglasses, but I don’t think that’s just a guy thing.
4. Fact: Men can’t resist the snack cart babe. Well, it would be a lot easier if she didn’t all that food too. But we men need that candy bar extra boost after the front nine. However, we apparently resist trash cans like our dishes resist the kitchen sink.
5. Clean enough. This undershirt makes my polos stay sweat-free so I don’t have to do laundry. Plus, it dries quick and resists odor & bacteria so I can stuff it in my bag for the next round. Don’t forget the deep neck to let my polo sport all that lovely chest hair.
6. Beer after the match? Why not now? This too may or may not be a guy thing, but men do prefer beer, and we don’t wait for the opportunity to drink it.
7. Rub some dirt on it. After that last putt, my mind focuses on one thing: the 19th hole. Similar to my car with the rain, my dirty clubs will eventually clean themselves.
Like I said, hopefully I’m an exception to the male golfer, and I did not damage men’s golf reputations everywhere. But then again, we each play the game for different reasons in our own unique way, and our golf bag can reflect that. So, other than a cigar, am I missing anything a guy would usually have? Do you have a man’s golf bag?